so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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