im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
