She's JV to your varsity
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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