Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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