BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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