Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
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