READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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