I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize