..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
