Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
