Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
