your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
