At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize