If that was your dad, he is hot
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
