Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
