My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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