nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
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