what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
