If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Randomize
