i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
