I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
