i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
nutella sex= disaster
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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