I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
