ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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