Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize