Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
In other news, I just burned my penis
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
