even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
