youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
