Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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