She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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