I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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