she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
