my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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