oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Im part way to drunk.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
