The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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