dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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