Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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