hell yes lets make some ravioli
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
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