oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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