The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
he's gonorrhea incarnate
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Randomize
