Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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