yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
