Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
