Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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