I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
