i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
