Jerry, you need to find god
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Someone signed my nipple.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
