I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Randomize