if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
