i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
